Most men are unaware that they are addicted to their ejaculation.  A large number of mammal and human studies have established, that central neurotransmitters such as dopamine, serotonin and prolactin and their receptors play an important role in the regulation of sexual arousal and ejaculation in men.

Climax is a powerful drug which affects our perceptions, priorities, feelings of wellbeing, contentment and relationship harmony.

Here are some reasons for practicing semen retention and making ejaculation a choice:

More energy

Every time you ejaculate you are draining your vital life force energy. Athletes are told not to have sex the day before an important event, building sexual energy is a good thing, it is the ejaculation that causes problems. This also means a reduced need for sleep which men usually need after ejaculation.

Increased sex drive

A Chinese study shows that semen retention increases testosterone levels by a staggering 47.6% after 7 days! Not only will you last longer, you will also be harder and more turned on.

Increased muscle mass

As testosterone plays a huge part in building muscles, men practicing semen retention and weight lifting report an increase in muscle mass too.


You are capable of being just as orgasmic as women, but not if you ejaculate. When practicing semen retention, you can have full, whole body, multiple orgasms, with one rolling continuously into the next. It does take some time to retrain yourself as you are building new neural pathways, but it is worth it! Instead of having a quick peak orgasm where you loose and push the energy outwards you can have valley orgasms where the energy stays inside your body and builds. You will be surprised along the way what may open up for you.

Increased sexual stamina

You will be able to manage your sexual response and condition your body so that sexual stimulation can last as long as you choose. Women need between 20 and 40 minutes of penetration to experience those mind blowing orgasms. You will have a deeper sense of self-confidence, knowing you can satisfy your partner.

 Overcome sexual dysfunctions

According to Ancient Taoists, the most common reason for erectile dysfunction is excessive ejaculation. The main cure is creating more sexual energy without ejaculation.

 Deeper love and partner connection

Higher levels of oxytocin result in connection with your lover and decreased attraction to a new, novel potential mate. Porn and other experiences outside yourself are no longer enticing.

And an overall sense of wellbeing with less neediness and irritability.

When a man ejaculates there is a corresponding change to the hormone levels. Those hormone levels take several days potentially weeks to normalise or reach homeostasis – if you don’t ejaculate again!!

Procreation and Transformation from Matthias Schwenteck on Vimeo.

Dopamine: A neurotransmitter chemical that is responsible for transmitting signals in between the nerve cells (neurons) of the brain. Mood and cravings regulator. Post ejaculation results in low levels and you seek out a temporary dopamine hit from things like alcohol, drugs, over-eating, spending binge and a drive to ejaculate again. Side effects can include brain fog.

Prolactin: A hormone secreted by the pituitary gland located in the brain. High prolactin occurs post ejaculation and can decrease libido and cause erectile dysfunction, it puts the erotic pleasure brakes on, can cause a loss of erection and lowers erotic satisfaction from subsequent ejaculations during days 1-17.

Oxytocin: “the love and bonding hormone” acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. Regulates social interaction and sexual reproduction, playing a behavioral role for men relating to empathy, generosity, kissing/cuddling and orgasm. Low Oxytocin post ejaculation results in disconnection with your lover and increased attraction to a new, novel potential mate.

Here is my suggestion of how to:

  1. Explore your solo masturbation practice to become aware of your arousal levels paying particular attention to finding your point of no return (80%) and working out how to cruise between (50-70%) arousal without reaching your point of no return. Explore the edges of these ranges, pay attention and be aware of your breath and feelings your body. This may well involve fun, pleasure and some ejaculation! It may take quite a few sessions of really paying attention to fully understand your arousal response levels. Bringing The P Wand into your practice will help you explore yourself on a deeper level. Stay away from porn as this takes you out of your body and into your mind.
  2. Commit to not ejaculating for one month to experience the beneficial effects of normal hormone levels. Yes, you can choose to ejaculate after the one month experiment, it’s not banned. We don’t want this to feel like punishment, but an opportunity to explore yourself and your edges.
  3. Listen and follow the guided hand meditation below daily to open up the direct route of pleasure. After a while you may not need to be guided and will be able to do this on your own. Our hands have more nerve endings than any other part of the body, except our genitals and mouth. They are an extension of the heart and what we used to speak our first language, the language of touch. Consistently using this practice brings you into an embodied state and out of your mind. You are waking up the feeling part in your brain and learning to be in action while receiving pleasure through your sensory inflow. This creates the foundation for your nervous system to go into the transformative bliss state.
  4. You can explore the direct route of pleasure with your partner too and have gentle sex as long as your partner is wanting to support you and not drive you to ejaculate. It is very important to relax, feel the whole body and be aware of the breath particularly when reaching 50-70% levels of arousal. The level of erotic pleasure experienced at the 50-70% levels will increase over time as brain pathway re-wiring occurs. Eventually the erotic feeling of this level will increase to be above your old point of no return (80%). Being present, conscious and relaxed are key – be aware of any tension and relax into the practice. Tension in the inner thighs/buttocks and shorter breathing patterns, leaving the body and going into the mind are common, ingrained behaviors. It takes time and important to be patient and kind with yourself. If you partner is up for it let them help you explore your prostate too.
  5. Regular prostate massage will also aid the process by releasing stress and tension.

This may well be the first time you have not ejaculated for a whole month since puberty!

Your sexual energy is a powerful force so containing and building your sexual energy in the body rather than spilling it out by ejaculation is transformational. This method does not really require PC control and is not edging. RELAXATION AND AWARENESS are key, they will become easier the more you practice. Exploring different breath work techniques can also support you during the process.

Common complications that may arise from non-ejaculation practices are:

When you no longer ejaculate seminal fluid and or sexual energy can build and lead to “Blue Balls” in some men. There is a natural lymphatic drainage system that drains away excess seminal fluids. This system is often atrophied due to constant ejaculation and will activate naturally within a few days or weeks. Cold water can also help soothe.

A feeling of constant sexual tension, high and jittery sexual energy. This is due to rewiring pathways and will normalise.

Not relaxing and/or constantly edging during stimulation. This increases dopamine above normal levels which is a pre-cursor to Adrenaline. Relaxing during stimulation will instead increase Oxytocin (the love and bonding hormone).

Orgasm and ejaculation are separate pathways that usually occur nearly at the same time (Orgasm actually occurs slightly before ejaculation) but these can be separated by re-wiring the pathways thus making orgasm and multiple orgasm without ejaculation possible and achievable.

Ultimately this is about understanding/feeling your own body and exploring your own limits and experience in an informed way. Everyone’s experience will be unique. If you feel you need some more guidance and support seek out someone experienced in Tantra or get in touch with me and I can put you in touch with someone.